The Writer's 100 Theme Challenge
by Wolfie Kid
Summary: Taken from the Deviantart Meme by Caenai-Gyoesari. A collection of one-shots taken from a list of 100 different themes designed to challenge a writer's skills.
1. Beginnings

Beginnings

Another day. Another meeting. Another half hour of listening to Xemnas ramble on. And on. And on. And on. And on some more. ... then maybe a little more just for the satisfaction of hearing his own voice falling blissfully unaware on deaf ears.

However, today turned out to be different. Today, there was something other than Xemnas' wet dream to discuss. Eleven pairs of eyes bore down upon the hooded individual stood below: unmoving, back arched slightly in restlessness, but standing still like a good little minion nonetheless.

"Gentlemen," the droning, dull, monotone voice rumbled out, washing over like a stifling breeze. "Today, we gather to welcome another into our ranks. Another has stepped forward to wear the coat and help our cause."

'Another'. 'Another'. He always used that word when introducing 'another' poor sap. He liked de-humanising them. It meant he could make no attachments. A 'he' became an 'it' and the name was just a little tag to make conversation a little easier. Not that Xemnas even really lowered himself to direct face-to-face conversation with his neophytes.

Nonetheless, they all peered down, oogling at the mysterious newcomer below, as if trying to drink in every detail of a creature in a freak show. The bright white sheen of the room made such a stark contrast with the black-cloaked figure far below, their visions became blurred and made any chance of distinguishing them out practically impossible.

So, it came as an immense shock when Xemnas said, "Allow me to introduce our new Number Twelve..." The figure removed their hood, provoking disbelieving gasps from the men surrounding them. "... Larxene."

The impossible had just happened. There was a woman among them.

* * *

"A woman!? A woman of all things, can you believe it!?" Luxord was muttering as he dealt the cards. Opposite him, Axel grunted in equal disapproval and growled, "Damn women... what good are they for?"

"Aren't you guys being just a teensy bit mean?" Demyx asked timidly as he looked at the hand Luxord had dealt him before promptly folding, tipping on his chair in boredom.

"No," they both answered instantly.

"For once – and God forbid if I ever have these filthy words pass my mouth again – I actually agree with Nine," Zexion chipped in from the sofa where he was deeply engrossed in an anthology of poetry. "I had a chat with her shortly after her introduction. An intelligent girl she is: strong-willed."

"Who CARES if she's smart? I bet she's a complete wuss!"

"And why do you assume that, Eight?"

"Cus... cus, well... she's a GIRL."

"A rather sexist remark, don't you think?" Zexion raised an eyebrow, looking over the pages of the book to the red head, Demyx nodding in agreement with his arms folded. "Yeah Ax, don't make judgements just cus she's a girl."

Axel just slyly batted his hand into Demyx's chair while it was balanced precariously on it's back two legs and sent the guy tumbling backwards with a wail. "Oh come off it: let's just look at this realistically," he began counting on his fingers. "Women have been proven not to be as strong as men. I saw next to no muscle on her from what I could see. Her figure is WAAAY too delicate to be of any use... and she's blond."

"Ahem."

"Present company excluded, Luxord."

"... AHEM," Demyx chipped in moodily. Axel just ignored him and continued, "She's probably gonna faint at the sight of blood, squeal at the sight of violence, not to mention this'll make things much more awkward for US! We can't have 'man-chats' anymore!"

"You never let me listen in on them anyway!" Demyx protested, setting his chair back up and sitting on it, only to have Axel knock him off again for interrupting.

"She'd probably demand we tidy up more, that we do CHORES, that we stop using bad language..."

"You know, you said all this when Marluxia joined, and you got owned when we found he really was a man," Zexion actually managed a sneaky smile. "Though she is, indeed, a woman. You make too many snap judgements, Eight... get to know her before you label her as 'useless'. You might find yourself pleasantly surprised."

"What's that meant to mean, Mr McScratch-and-Sniff?" Axel demanded sulkily, but got no answer as Zexion got up from his seat, book tucked under his arm and his legs taking him through a portal to his room to read in peace.

"I think he means you should try talking to her."

"Pah! Like hell I will! I might catch her girly-ness."

"... Well... I might go chat to her. It'd be nice to talk to a girl for a while."

"Heh, noooo Demyx! Don't go toward the liiiiight!" Axel snorted sarcastically. "Stay heeeereeee! With uuuuuus! Be coooool! If you are seen with her, people will suspect thiiiiiiings!"

Demyx just stared at him unimpressed, then got to his feet, walking out the room, calling, "Have fun being a pain in the ass, Ax. Oh and by the way, Lux: he has a pair of aces and three Queens."

"TRAITOR!" Axel howled as Luxord wisely folded with a devious smirk. Demyx looked pretty proud of himself when he was brought to a jumpy halt. Xigbar was directly blocking his path whilst standing on the ceiling. He was surprised he hadn't noticed the Freeshooter there a few seconds before.

"If you're going to go speak to the new girl, so long, and goodbye: leave me something in your will."

Demyx's face went into one of nervous shock and he nervously stammered, "w-w-what?"

"Trust me, Squirt: this girl's power ain't something you of all people should want to wrangle with."

"That blond bimbo has a power?" Axel asked in disbelief.

"Probably 'girl-power'," Luxord chuckled, making Axel burst into roars of laughter. Xigbar narrowed his one eye and said gruffly, "Laugh all ya want kids. Just don't come crying to me when the hag rips you a new one."

"Hag? Oh, and Zexion thinks WE'RE the mean ones!"

"Trust me guys... that ain't no pretty dame we've got ourselves."

"Eh, I won't deny she was pretty, but still... a hag?"

"Ooooooh! Axel thinks she's pretty! Axel thinks she's pretty!" Demyx began singing tauntingly, dodging the fireballs that began hurling in his direction and running out the room laughing as the Flurry stammered with a bright red face of rage, "EW! NOT LIKE THAT! EEEWWW!"

"Squirt! Wait! I didn't even tell you what her power was!" Xigbar shouted, actually sounding concerned. However, Demyx was long gone and happily chuckling his way towards the kitchen. Xigbar sighed and mumbled, "Well, that's probably the last we'll ever see of him... poor kid."

"Relaaaaax, he may be a pushover and he may be annoying as hell, but this is a GIRL we're on about, Xig."

"Correction: this is a girl who controls LIGHTNING and could probably kill Water Boy with one little volt."

Axel and Luxord blanched with a sudden twinge of horror.

"Oh," Luxord said weakly.

* * *

"Leeeexxxxxxxy!"

Lexaeus didn't look up from his newspaper at the kitchen table, despite the youth poking him in the shoulder repeatedly.

"LEEEEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXYYYYYYYYY-" A gasp for air – "YYYYY!"

"..."

Demyx took another huge intake of breath and whined, "LEEEEEEXYYYYY" – gasp – "YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!"

"... Can I help you Demyx?"

"... Do you know where I can find the new girl?"

"She's with Marluxia in his garden. He's showing her around."

"Thank you, Lexy!"

And with that, the guy skipped off whistling merrily.

Two seconds later, Axel skidded into the kitchen and wailed, "LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEX!"

Lexaeus sighed inwardly and wondered if he'd ever get any peace.

"Yes Axel?"

"Where's Demyx!? I HAVE TO SAVE HIM FROM THE CLUTCHES OF THE EVIL HAG LADY GIRLY THING!"

Lexaeus eyed him up and down, then enquired, "Do you happen to mean Number Twelve?"

Axel nodded violently, hopping from one foot to the other impatiently.

"Why? What's wrong?"

"JUST TELL ME BEFORE SHE ELECTRO-KILLS HIM!"

Lexaeus raised an eyebrow, took his sweet time debating whether Axel was insane, then announced, "What makes you think she would hurt him?"

"LEX JUST FREAKING TELL ME!"

Lexaeus was starting to enjoy this. It wasn't often he got his hands on some mental blackmail, and Axel's current hysterics were proving potentially entertaining. However, he kept his stone face and said calmly, and deliberately slowly to further stall him, "That is no way to speak to a Superior, Number Eight."

Axel looked close to blowing a random kitchen appliance up in panic, but he blabbered a brief hundred-mile-an-hour apology then asked again.

"...Well.......................................... Let me see............................. hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.................................. I think I MAY have seen him......................... or I may not have... Hmmmmm...................................."

Axel gave a puppy-whine in pleading.

"..."

Another whine. A nervous fidget.

"......."

Axel was now jumping around like a child in desperate need for the bathroom.

"... Now I remember."

The Flurry's face lit up.

"... No... no it's gone again."

A pathetic wail.

"Wait! Yes! Yes it's come back to me!"

A hopeful grimace.

"... nope. Sorry. Can't help you."

Axel gave a stifled scream of frustrated desperation and took off at speed in the completely wrong direction to seek out the blond himself, leaving Lexaeus sat there with a smug satisfied grin on his face that he quickly hid back behind his newspaper. Oh yeah: he hadn't lost it.

* * *

By this time Demyx was just entering Marluxia's private garden, when he heard a conversation, and not wanting to interrupt, he felt it would be best and more polite to stay half-hidden by the wooden rose-covered awning and linger about until he heard a break in the conversation.

However, his youthful, mischievous inner child hissed at him to take a quick peek at who it was and what they were up to, and he found himself peering through the thorny curtains and beyond into the heart of Marluxia's garden.

His eyes widened in surprise.

There was the new girl, sat on one of Marluxia's white stone benches, staring in a rather bored way at the tulips he was ranting on about. However, Marluxia himself was what intrigued Demyx. The guy was prancing around excitedly, throwing sakura petals with every sweep of his arm as he pointed out all his precious 'babies' to her. He was speaking in an airy, care-free way and seemed to be patting her shoulder an awful lot. It reminded Demyx of...

"Hee hee, that prince-type flirty guy from that anime... Tamaki, wasn't it?" he mused to himself deviously chuckling. "Oh man, don't tell me Marly is trying to iimpress/i her!?"

He began giggling childishly, his hands over his mouth as he closed his eyes and tried to stifle his mirth. _Marly has a crush? A crush on the new girl? Oh boy, this is the stuff corny love songs are made of!_

He pulled himself together after a few more seconds and put a hand to his chin in thought. Now, ithis/i information could prove very, very useful. Considering that Marluxia usually treated him like dirt...

Demyx actually managed a cruel grin for the first time since losing his heart as he gave a nasty quiet cackle and drummed his fingertips together in a scheming way.

"Oh sweet Madonna, the fun I can have with THIS... heh heh-"

"DEEEEMMMMMMYYYYYYYYY!"

Axel came out of nowhere (or rather a thick shrubbery to be more accurate) and lunged wildly for the bewildered Nocturne, sending both men crashing through the awning, staggering on a few more steps, then into the tree directly between Marluxia and Larxene, where they collapsed in a heap on the floor.

"DON'T GO DEMMY! WE LOVE YOU! DON'T GET YOURSELF KILLED!"

"Axel!? Get the hell off of me!"

The force of their bump into the tree had sent leaves cascading down... as well as a beehive.

Four screams rang out across the garden to the accompaniment of ominous buzzing.

* * *

Vexen stared at the three men blankly.

"Do I even want to ask?"

"... There was an incident in Marluxia's garden involving bees."

"... Bees cannot break bones, Axel."

"No. But a pissed off woman with lightning powers and a heck of a good throw can."

Vexen turned to face Larxene, who was lamenting a broken nail irritably. Then he turned back to the battered and, in Axel's case, broken-armed men, all swaying giddily, covered in bruises. Demyx had little wisps of steam curling off him and parts of his statically ravished hair was charred black at the roots. He coughed with a puff of smoke coming out of his mouth. Marluxia was just glaring unhappily, his hair dripping with honey and his usually unblemished face riddled with sting marks.

Vexen just shook his head and got to work leading them into the infirmary, leaving Larxene outside, now with her hands on her hips, watching them with the barest hint of a smirk.

"You know," she said lightly, turning to Zexion, who had been stood unseen in the shadows, his back to the wall smiling. "I think I'm going to like it here."

The short man laughed softly. "I think so too. "

"Yeeeaaah. I think I can get used to this..." she burst into laughter and shouted, "Look out, boys! There's a new bitch in town and she's here to stay!"


	2. Humour

2) Humour

"Zeeeexxxyyyyyy-"

"Nine, will you please, _please _cease drawling out embarrassing nicknames like a sorry excuse of a kitten mewling for food?"

"Whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhy?"

" Move me not."

"... Huh?"

Zexion sighed and explained wearily, "Do not push me."

"... You need to lighten up, Zexy."

"You need to find yourself a hobby other than tormenting your Superiors, Nine. And for the last time: enough with the ridiculous nicknames!"

"....... You know what I think?"

"Oh do tell. Astound me with your infinite wisdom, oh master of the mind and the matters therein."

"I think... you need a hug."

The colour practically sucked itself out of Zexion's face as he dropped his precious Lexicon and – rather like a cat that had just had a bucket of water thrown over it whilst napping – shot up from his lounging position and bolted to the other side of the couch, eyes huge, his senses on edge, his fingertips digging into the fabric as Demyx grinned cheekily opposite, positioned in a cat-like way himself: waiting to pounce, grinning manically.

"Absolutely not!" Zexion gulped, moving swiftly to keep the sofa between them whilst Demyx chortled and tried catching him until they were simply running laps about the piece of furniture.

"Awww, c'mon Zexy! You'll feel better afterwards! Promise!"

"NO!" Zexion had scooped up his book again and aimed a hefty swing in the Nocturne's direction to swat the pesky thing away. Demyx persisted though and tried to grab him over the couch, almost tumbling over it when he missed the Schemer. The fumble was enough to let Zexion rush out the room through a portal and hide away in the lair he called his bedroom. There'd be no chance of hugging him now: Zexion's room was a death-trap due to his slight paranoia and ability to make a harmless dresser look like a hell-hound. And Demyx had had his fair share of hell-hounds in this Organization.

Speaking of hell hounds...

"Hi Saix!"

"Greetings. Did you want something, or were you just slacking off as usual, Nine?"

"... Do _you _need a hug too, Saix?"

The claymore was out in seconds. "If you so much as twitch in my general direction whilst that question is still fresh upon your lips, I shall castrate you."

"... A simple no would've done," the discouraged youth sighed hopelessly.

----------------

_Dear Diary,_

_Oh, how sweet the blossom blooms! How succulent the scent of paradise passes by my senses! My friend: in this cluttered and ugly garden of weeds, a rose has lifted her glorious crown and smiled down upon me... oh, so fair. So beautiful. Like all roses, she is covered in thorns, but still she blooms and thrives. Her name is Larxene, and I cannot fully describe how gloriously the sensation of her presence swells my soul! If only I could get a little closer and be able to view her without the thorns, then I might truly know what it is about her that ravishes me so-_

Xigbar couldn't keep reading, he was laughing too hard. Below him, Marluxia was burning bright crimson as he leapt up to try and swipe his diary back from the Freeshooter standing above him on the ceiling.

"Dude!" Xigbar was howling in hoarse gasps for air between laughter. "Dude, she's been here FIVE DAYS and you're freakin' spouting POETRY over her! Bwahahahaaaaa! Oh Christ! This is GOLD!"

"Unhand that journal!" Marluxia screamed angrily.

"Hey, how about I go show the chick herself this lil' extract, huuh?"

"YOU DARE AND I'LL-"

"SNEAK HUUUUG!" Demyx came out of nowhere and tackled Marluxia to the floor, hugging tightly and snuggling slightly.

Xigbar actually fell off the ceiling from laughing and dropped the diary, which Marluxia practically crawled (still with Demyx attached like a baby monkey on him) to retrieve, jumping to his feet, throwing his 'attacker' off and dashing back to his room to lock up the incriminating evidence. Demyx was left pouting on the floor, arms folded as he huffed, "Oh poo. Why will no one let me hug them?"

"Because you got mites?"

Demyx took off a boot and threw it at his mentor who was hit square in the face and stopped laughing to give a moody, "HEY! Fine, if ya gonna get violent over a little hug, go find Axel!"

"... His arm is still in a sling."

"... The new girl?"

"... Bear in mind exactly what she put me through on her first day. I do not want to repeat it. Plus she doesn't strike me as a 'huggy' kind of person."

"Lex can be a huggy kind of person if you're lucky."

"Yeeeaaaah... about that... I kind of messed up his rubix cube after he spent all last year working it out..."

Xigbar whistled and actually crossed himself. "Good luck with that, Squirt."

"... Luxord?"

"I owe him munny."

"...Mansex?"

"... I'd be killed."

"Xaldin."

"Ditto."

"Vexen?"

"I'm not that desperate."

"Zexion?"

"... He ran away to his lair."

Xigbar sighed and rubbed his chin, mumbling, "Well, can't think of anyone else... Looks like yer outta luck on this one, Squirt."

The words had barely left his mouth before Demyx launched himself at him and tackle hugged him, bringing him down onto a normal plane of gravity and laughing. "Got yooouuuuuuu, Xiggy!"

"Uh... the hell!? Get off me, you freak! Gerroff or I'll tickle you!"

Demyx tried to cease his hugging at that threat, but he was too slow and Xigbar slyly poked him on the back of his neck. Before the first squeal of laughter broke out his mouth, he found himself in a headlock being tickled relentlessly whilst he chortled, laughed, snorted and squeaked, rolling and struggling vainly to free himself. "No! NO! Xiggy let goaahahahahahaaaaaaaaaahaaaaa! N-n-nooo-aaaahhhhhh hah heeeee haaaaaa!"

He did not stop though and it was only when Larxene walked in that they both paused, staring at her.

"Hey, either of you guys know where the Bossman hangs out? I gotta complain about the bathroom facilit... ies..."

She trailed off, raising an eyebrow and staring rather divided in disgust and amusement at what she saw before her. Neither of the men realised that fact Xigbar was sat on Demyx's belly, pinning him down, looked rather... 'suggestive'.

The blond spun on her heels and said in a rather giddy and embarrassed voice, "WHOA, hope I wasn't interrupting anything... I had no idea you guys were... uh... 'batting for the other team'... though I always had my suspicions about you, Blondie..."

And with that she slammed the door shut and scurried back to her room, leaving the two men to watch her in bemusement for about ten seconds of silence...

Before Xigbar childishly carried on, provoking a squeal of involuntary baby-like giggles.


	3. Drama

3) Drama

Hidden away safely in his room, Zexion was sat. Just sitting. Nothing more. It allowed him time to think, or to calm himself, or even bore himself to sleep. However, when one simply sits, they can essentially detach themselves from what casual onlookers would sense, and begin to sense things that would usually go unnoticed.

His nose tingled. It was not a strong scent, nor an unpleasant one. More... discomforting. Subtle. Sneaky. Secretive.

He opened his eyes.

"I must tell the Superior..."

"You are sure?"

"I'm positive, Xemnas."

"We should have really expected this," Xaldin piped up thickly from his seat beside the Superior's. Xemnas nodded wistfully then murmured, "Where did you detect this monster?"

"She is close by. I'm sure a scouting party could easily find her and destroy her before... '_they' _find her."

"I'll go," Lexaeus grumbled instantly. "I can easily destroy her with much more ease than anyone else, and any greater number of members on this task would attract the attentions of our more ignorant. It would be best not to let the neophytes find out about _'them_'. Lest they go seeking trouble."

"Well said, Lexaeus. We don't want to frighten our little 'children' now, do we?"

"No Superior," a chorus of drones went up from the three other nobodies present.

"Now go. Find her and annihilate her before they find her. Destroy anything that gets in your way, unless they bear the Thirteenth Order's Symbol... in that case just knock them out."

Lexaeus made to nod in understanding when suddenly Vexen burst into the room dramatically, wearing a pair of science goggles and a lab coat.

"XEMNAS! THERE IS AN INTRUDER IN THE GROUNDS! MY NEW TOP-TECH COMPUTER JUST ALERTED-"

"It's being taken care of, Vexen. Zexion sensed the intruder and we've already found the correct course of action."

Vexen folded his arms, stamped his foot and grumbled darkly under his breath, "One day... one day my beautiful technology shall out-manoeuvre that wretched nose!"

Meanwhile, elsewhere...

"You know the drill."

"Why me?" the voice whined irritably.

"Because I ordered you to. Also, you are the quickest tongued individual we have. I'm sure you can sweet-talk her into joining us."

"But Master-"

"I said go... unless you wish to 'resign' permanently from your duties...?"

"... No Master. As you wish, Master."

"Good boy. Now go!"

"Sir sir sir! Can I go!? Can I? Huh? Huh? HUH? HUH!? Can I can I can I-"

"NO!"

"Oh but why not? Come on, Sir! Please, please, please, please, pleeeeaaaaaase can I can I can I-"

"Are you high or something, man!?"

The second voice came back with a long sigh. "He ate a lot earlier. It gave him a buzz."

"Uh, FINE. Now both of you get out of my sight! And DESTROY anything that gets in your way! Obtain her at all costs!"

"YES!"

"Yes Sir."

In the darkening and mist-filled streets of The World That Never Was, Lexaeus was slowly but silently making his way through the black towers and gloomy alleys to where Zexion's nose had pin-pointed the scent of their unwelcome and potentially dangerous guest. He was not afraid of simply walking into the confrontation, and was more than confident that this intruder would possess very little challenge: after all, she was a newborn. She would hardly be able to use her powers so soon. But still, a potential threat is a potential threat, and must be eliminated to save future annoyance.

However, he hesitated slightly when he found her. She already had company.

"Braig. Dyme. How nice to see you," he called coldly.

Two human-shaped heartless of similar appearance to a couple of certain nobodies glanced up at him, baring their claws in defence. The third figure behind them didn't flinch, she just tilted her head in confusion at his appearance.

The less scrawny of the two male heartless narrowed his glowing yellow eyes and hissed to his partner in a low whine, "Now what? This one's the tough one!" The other heartless ignored him and waved at Lexaeus hyperactively, yelling, "Hiiiii, Aelly!"

"Yes, hello Braig. Now if you'd be so kind as to step away from the girl behind you."

"No can do! She's _ours_!" Dyme growled, fangs just visible in his mouth as he hissed again, like an agitated cat.

"Yeeeaaaah, Norty wants her," Braig shrugged apologetically, with a Cheshire grin.

"Very well. Then I shall destroy you too." The tomahawk materialised.

"Uh... uh..." Dyme suddenly wavered in confidence and announced, "I'm just... gonna... take the girl back to Master Xehanort. Okay? You two obviously have a lot to catch up on, and I'm sure I'll just get in the way so-"

He squealed in outrage as a stalagmite nearly speared him, and as he dove out the way and slunk into a puddle of dark sludge on the floor, his two amber eyes peered out the dark mass and glared at Lexaeus. "FINE! You wanna fight, you'll get one!"

As Braig gave a little chuckle and pulled out two eerily similar guns to Xigbar's, Dyme's puddle-form began to expand, covering the whole street, before localising at a point behind Lexaeus where he reformed into his human-figure, now with a purple demonic-looking guitar fastened messily to his very chest.

Lexaeus merely analysed their positions, thinking carefully and predicting their attacks, eyes scanning for possible dodging opportunities and counters.

When suddenly he got a kick to the side of his head.

Even Braig and Dyme lowered their weapons with a stunned sort of confusion.

The 'girl' heartless was giggling manically, hopping from one foot to the other, fists clenched, a dopey insane fang-filled smile dominating her face. As Lexaeus straightened up from the blow and glared at her, she did a neat twirl, giggling, "Tee hee..."

Braig and Dyme shared a look, then burst into their own smiles.

"Looks like she's coming with us after all... Arlene! Your first order under the Law of the Antis! Kill this wretched Nobody!"

"Kaaaay~" she giggled again before all three of the heartless charged simultaneously...


	4. Scary

4) Scary

The room was full of silence, but somehow it spoke unimaginable volumes. Both pairs of eyes bore into each other in distrusting, loathing, reluctant determination: narrowed and cold. They felt the whole 'staring contest' was lasting an eternity, and they both lost interest quickly, but for their pride's sake, still kept the facade as the shorter one unfolded her arms and sighed, "I'm sorry for breaking your arm."

"No you're not," Axel retorted moodily, pouting like a sulky teenager. Larxene ground her teeth but repeated with forced pleasantness, "No. I really am sorry." He just snorted and turned his head up at her, which was rather pointless considering he was easily two heads taller. However, it had the desired effect and she snapped suddenly, "Asshole."

"Bitch."

"This is the thanks I get for apologising?"

"Uh, no. It's the thanks you get for _breaking my arm_."

"I said I was damn sorry, okay, Red?"

"Oh. You will be sorry," he grunted quietly before pushing past her with his newly released arm and stomping childishly down the hallway.

"Fine, Knuckles! I'll look forward to seeing your pathetic attempt at revenge!" she shouted back at him. He just stuck a finger in his ear ignorantly, then used the same finger to display offensive sign language before he disappeared around the corner. She gave him multiple replies in the same manner, though his back was turned, and once he was gone she spun on her heels and stormed away, literally. "I didn't even want to apologise in the first place, you piece of trash... was all Zexion's idea..."

She scuffed her boots moodily on the cold marble, pausing by the large window that dominated a whole wall of the corridor. Propping her elbows on the windowsill and resting her chin on her hands, she gazed out with a tedious expression.

_It is so boring here. If we're really not meant to feel... then why am I so bored...?_

"Slaaaccckkkeeeerrrrr!"

She jerked and snapped her head to glare at the corner at the far end. She caught a flash of crimson as Axel ducked his head back around again. Flushed red in mild irritation, she huffed and went back to moon-gazing out the window.

_And why does everyone treat me like a jackass, just cus I'm the newbie? I'll show 'em. All of them. All I need is an opportunity._

A huge crash and a cry of agonising pain jolted her right out of her thoughts, and she straightened right up. The sound of falling rubble and groans were interrupted by Axel's unmistakable whining of, "I think... I broke... my arm again..."

She was debating whether to go investigate and laugh at his misfortune, or to ignore him incase it was a trick to lead her into a prank, when suddenly she heard a second familiar voice: his name escaped her, but... the quiet one, very tall, muscular...

There came a huge grunt and a bellow of 'Be GONE' that made the thunder in her stir with a want for adrenaline, and something was thrown bodily from the hidden action around the corner into her view, smashing into the opposite wall to the action. They dislodged themselves from the wall, groaning and rolling their shoulders until they heard a crack, before stretching. They were black from head to toe, and there was something familiar about that haircut...

Noticing he had an audience, Braig froze, then slowly flicked his burning yellow eyes onto her. A smile cracked his face, and Larxene barely had time to gasp before she felt him warp behind her. She spun around to scream or attack or run away or _something_. She hadn't even had her second training lesson yet! What was going on!? Was he friendly!? What WAS he?

"You're even prettier in the flesh..." he said.

She fumbled backwards, speechless, frowning, mouth agape in shock. She certainly had not been expecting that response from him. He ignored her reaction and just leant closer, grinning manically, cupping her chin as she locked up completely. "Yeeaaah... but your eyes ain't as nice... shame..."

She was now on autopilot, her brain being unable to keep up with the questions pounding against her skull. She gave a noise of distaste and punched him in the face before running away, yelling, "Heeelp!"

She coincidentally bumped into Lexaeus, who had Dyme in a stranglehold with one hand and Arlene tucked under his other arm. Axel was half-buried and still complaining under the remains of what used to be a solid marble wall that sections off the street from the castle's innards. Lexaeus ignored her and simply tossed the gagging heartless out through the hole in the wall. He landed rather badly, tumbling like a human ball over and over himself for several feet before coming to stop, legs in the air and face planted into the concrete. Lexaeus turned his attention to Arlene and summoned his tomahawk, preparing to pummel her heartless existence to death.

A frightened gasp and a low chuckle made him freeze in mid-swing. Biting his lip, he slowly and cautiously turned, still with Arlene suspended in mid-air.

"Be a gooood boy, Ell..." Braig smirked, his gun pressed firmly against a certain redhead's skull, whilst Dyme had looped his guitar over Larxene and held her pinned between him and the instrument. Unlike Braig, he seemed incredibly irritated, and itching for blood. "Let the pretty lil' thing down... and we'll just be on our way. Sound good, dude?"

"Release them first," Lexaeus answered firmly.

"You have three seconds to let her go before we slice them to ribbons."

"... Let them go first."

"Three."

Two sets of green eyes bore into Lexaeus desperately as the panic settled in with deadly silence on their part. The older male did not meet their gazes, however, and just focused his eyes onto Braig, who seemed to be thoroughly enjoying himself.

"Twoooo~"

Lexaeus relented... by throwing Arlene into Braig, who fell back with her and ended up in a tangled mess. Dyme looked put out at his supposed superior being downed and gave a sniff before shouting, "We'll be back! Don't think this is over!" He then shoved Larxene away from him and jumped back to stand beside the other two before all three of them slipped into a giant black puddle... and vanished.

Panting in utter nervousness and sudden exhaustion, Larxene and Axel scrambled back to their feet and recoiled to where Lexaeus was, never taking their eyes off of where the dark threesome had been standing moments before.

"Wh-what were they!?" Larxene wheezed, hugging herself, eyes wide.

"Y-y-yeah, Lex... wh-wh-wh-what just h-happened?! They l-looked like... well... they looked... they looked..." Axel could barely even form a sentence, he was shaking so bad.

Lexaeus just closed his eyes thoughtfully, then put a reassuring hand on each of their heads.

"It was nothing," he said calmly, before smashing their heads together and knocking them both out for the count.

Axel awoke screaming an hour later in a bed in the infirmary. It only took him two seconds to realise he was alive and well, and safe, somewhere familiar. Hell, maybe that had just been a nasty dream...

"Not so loud..." an unwelcome voice grunted moodily. However, he felt an icy flannel dabbing his forehead and he blearily opened his eyes again. Part of his still-dopey and sleepy self imagined it could only be his mother. She often treated everything with a cold flannel, having little medical knowledge. However, he came back to reality when he saw the blond lean over him.

"What happened to you?" he half-sneered, half-boggled at the sight of an ice-pack strapped to her head at a jaunty angle. She just kept glaring, unimpressed and mumbled, "Same thing that happened to you."

"Oh," he said simply as he realised she was strapping on _his_ ice pack. It was losing its coldness fast as it kept up contact with his fiery scalp, but it was managing to numb the throbbing a little anyway. He drooped his eyelids and mumbled sulkily, "Leave me alone."

"I was left in charge of you by the blond crackpot," she stuck out her tongue, ignoring his request. It was clear she was enjoying this power over him, which made him uncomfortable. But, he was either too tired, too lazy, or too muddled by a sufficient gap in his memory just before this incident to stop her. He pondered what on earth could have happened. He could've asked Larxene, but he would not allow his pride to get injured by stooping that low. However, it became apparent that she had no clue either when she asked HIM, "Can you tell me what happened?"

"Man, we must've bumped our heads pretty hard."

"Hmph. Incidentally, you're arm is broken again."

He paled and tried moving his arms. To his horror, he found the same arm that he'd only just got healed up completely was screaming in pain at the simple thought of movement. He gave a whimper and slumped his head back into his pillows, wailing, "This is so not fair...!"

Larxene begged to differ: she found it hilarious.

"... They are becoming a problem."

"... Their number rivals our own yet again. And they're still getting more powerful."

"Do Axel and Larxene remember anything of the incident?"

"They seem aware there was a confrontation, but they believe it was between each other rather than with dark alternatives of their comrades."

"... Very good."

"Sir? Don't you think it would be better to inform them? The Antis have become a threat far too great to keep censored."

"The Neophytes must expect the unexpected. We shall consider this to be a practise run. And judging from the results, they are not ready yet. Not a soul breathes a word of this to number VIII to XII."

"What of Saix...?"

"... I feel I can trust him. Send for him, Zexion. We must strengthen our forces, and for that I shall need a strong right-hand man. I believe he is perfect for the duty."

"..."

"You look troubled, Zexion."

"... It's nothing, Sir."

"Then go."

"Yes sir."

Once outside the meeting room, Zexion's face contorted into a snarl. "I thought _Ienzo_ was always your second in command, Xehanort. What happened to you?"

He hesitated some more, then sighed heavily, portalling to find Saix whilst his mind overflowed with something he thought he'd lost some time ago. The ability to feel betrayal.


	5. Light

A/N: Quick message about What If. It's having a HUGE over-haul. It will take even longer, because I've realised how bad it is, and that it needs salvaging quickly before it becomes even more of a melodramatic sloppy fanfiction with totally unrealistic elements that shame the canon. Just know I HAVE been listening to all critique, and I plan to apply it. :3 Thank you all so much for all your great advice, and thank you for taking the time to help me become a better author.

* * *

5. Light

Against Xemnas' previous concerns, the Antis seemed to have pulled back for the time, and a period of normality (or at least, the closest the rag-tag bunch of morally-challenged Nobodies could get to normality) reigned. Saix easily passed his private little missions to win Xemnas' favour, and had been enjoying the position of second in command for about four months now. During this period of time, Zexion learnt (through some careful snooping and maybe a little rough-housing of an unfortunate Anti by the name of Even who was caught sneaking about Twilight town) that Ansem the Seeker of Darkness had moved his 'troops' off to Hollow Bastion to intercept one who was associated with the realm of light, and something was mentioned about princesses and keyholes, which bored the Nobodies at the time. However, Xemnas wanted to go take a look just to be on the safe side, and so the Organization was left in Saix's inexperienced care.

Of course, it came as no surprise when Saix found The Grey Area empty one morning, with a little note tacked to the window stating:

"We're bored. We've gone off to do 'important mission stuff' ...Yeah right..." – (the 'yeah right' having been crossed through poorly) - "Won't be back until we feel like it..." – (crossed through) – "We will only return once the 'mission' is completed. Love (not literally):

Numbers 2, 5,8,9,10,12

P.S – if we're in trouble when we get back... IT WAS THE NEW GIRL'S IDEA."

The pen suddenly careered off of the paper, as if the writer had been – Saix could only guess – stabbed quite viciously with a kunai from the accused. It mattered not. What did matter was Saix was now half an organization short of a full house, Xemnas was expecting him to discipline such deviancy from the main goal... and he hadn't been invited to whatever tomfoolery those miscreants were up to.

"Why am I never included in anything?" he grumped quite moodily as he tore down the paper and crushed it in his fist.

* * *

Luckily for Saix, he wasn't really missing out on much, except a rare chance to see Lexaeus drunk. And even then, it was hardly entertainment: Lexaeus had simply slumped across the bar and fallen asleep, still occasionally grunting awake for a few seconds, grumbling something indistinguishable, and then conking flat out again. It made a nice change to see the big guy relaxing though: most of the newer members hadn't dared to approach him due to him being so intimidating at first glance, so this side of him was quite amusing to a few of them.

Axel, however, was not happy.

"Why did _she_ have to come?" he hissed to Luxord, who had planned the little outing to the cheap city bar. Luxord glanced over his shoulder to where Larxene was stirring her vodka and orange lazily, looking bored out of her mind. Luxord turned back to the redhead and shrugged, replying, "Why not?"

"I'll tell you why not... she's not one of us boys!"

"I've noticed that," Luxord countered quite calmly. "Her thin waist emphasises the two objects that make it rather apparent she is not of male-orientation."

"You know what I mean."

"Speaking of our dear female companion, she seems to be getting some rather obnoxious attention."

"Seriously? This I gotta see," Axel snorted, glancing over his shoulder to watch. Luxord was, as always, correct: a couple of drunk, suave lads who had been quietly chortling in the corner elbowed their third friend, who was getting to his feet and approaching the bored blond woman with a sly air of confidence.

"Hey beautiful," he purred silkily, one elbow on the bar facing her braggishly. She took a long swig of her drink, then turned to face him, putting on a false smile.

"Hello, ugly."

He seemed not to hear, as he just gave yet another smirk, pushed back his dopey blond hair and carried on in that same drawling hiss, "You don't seem too comfortable sitting all on your lonesome in here."

"Probably because I have freaks trying and failing to flirt with me."

"You've got a quick tongue, beautiful. What else can it do?"

"Probably a lot more than your two-inch dick."

Across the room, pretending not to be eavesdropping, Demyx snorted with laughter into his drink and only succeeded in spilling most of it down his top.

Slightly perturbed now, the stranger's smile dropped for about two milliseconds before he carried on, "Can I... uh... buy you a drink?"

She finished her glass, sat in pretend ponderment, then answered, facing him dead on, still smiling pleasantly, "Is it not clear already? You want to screw my brains in. I don't want you to. The sight of you repulses me. You disgust me. I am way out of your league, and I have – shockingly – standards. The only way you could stand even less of a chance ever even getting physical contact from me is by asking me what time my legs open."

The poor man was obviously not very intelligent, or had very selective hearing. All he heard was 'the only way', 'getting physical contact from me', 'asking what time my legs open'.

Practically every male Nobody in the room (aside from a sleepy Lexaeus) held their breath and paled when the stupid, stupid man asked that one, most awful, most unforgivable, most cringe-worthy pick up line that could ever be said.

She sucked in her lips. Her face was unreadable. No one breathed. Everyone was watching now. Then finally, slowly, she pushed her empty glass aside, uncrossed her legs from over each other and said sweetly. "Right... about... now."

And with that she kicked him in the jaw, knocking out four of his teeth and letting a loud, resounding 'crack' echo all about the room, making every last drinker wince.

After the man had fled with his friends crying like a baby and Larxene had calmly asked the barkeeper for another vodka and orange, Axel just turned back to his own pint glass, eyes wide and simply hissed, "Holy. Shit."

As much as he really, _really_ hated to admit it... he was impressed.

* * *

Marluxia was spending the day in the library: he was sure Zexion had snipped more leaves off of his plants and pressed them into his biology journals, and intended to reattach them with his powers before they were ruined. His search unsuccessful, he had picked up some potentially interesting tale involving witches and the like, and ended up spending all afternoon there too. By this time, the tipsy and chuckling group of slackers who'd played hookey had returned and subtly sneaked about as if they were never gone, hoping Saix would not catch them unawares and lecture them all. The pink-haired Assassin was only aware of this when the door to the library was shut with some air of annoyance and high heels clacked upon the flagstones with purpose. His eyes surfaced from the top of the book, and his eyebrows raised in interested when he saw his favourite new member skulking around the shelves and straining on tip-toe to reach one book in particular. She appeared to be struggling.

Larxene herself hadn't realised Marluxia was there until he reached over her, plucked off the book and handed it to her. She eyes him with suspicion then thanked him, clutching it against her firmly. He smiled back and asked, "How was it today?"

"Urgh, don't even ask." She strode past him and slumped into his previously occupied space, but he didn't make a point of scolding her. Instead, he found himself a comfy chair opposite and smiled. "What were you expecting?"

She gave a quick snort and opened the book, thumbing over the first few pages. "Men truly are worthless scum," she mumbled. "Present company excluded. Then again, sometimes I wonder about you."

He pretended to look hurt but instead asked, "Do you have anything planned tonight?"

She snapped the book shut abruptly and glared at him. He raised his hands in defence and elaborated, "I was planning on tormenting Demyx for fun. Nothing more."

She scowled harder, making him gulp. However, she sighed, took up the page where she'd left off and answered with a disinterested huff, "Fine. That would make up for the abysmal entertainment he was earlier while we were out. What time?"

"I was thinking seven o'clock. That way his little redheaded bodyguard will be out of the castle having his ice cream, and it gives us a good hour of opportunity."

"You cunning devil," she chuckled in approval. "I like you. You have a brain, and I like how you use it."

He could only just surpress the vague pink flush of flattered sheepishness, before returning to his own book. And together the two of them sat reading silently, at peace in the other's company.

* * *

Sniff. "A-and then she took off the strings on Peggy! A-a-and then she knotted them together a-and laughed and s-said my sitar was g-gay and then they left after threatening to cut off my mullet and they were meeeeeaaaaan!"

Axel just robotically and emotionlessly patted the wailing youth's back, expression thoroughly unimpressed and a little agitated. He _hated_ having to baby his next door neighbour. Especially after having a really nice time stuffing his face with ice cream. He didn't mind helping him out if he needed it. Hell, he didn't even mind when he had nightmares and had to come into his room to talk it over: they _all_ had sorry pasts, it was understandable. But not being able to stick up for himself in his own room...? He was not in a 'consoling' mood.

"There there," he said in a voice that couldn't have been anymore unsympathetic if he'd tried. Demyx didn't notice though and kept wailing like some bullied four year old. Axel checked his watch as he stood rigidly. Demyx had been sobbing into his chest for about five minutes now, and his favourite television show was due to start any second.

"Listen, umm... I'll just go have a word with them, yeah?" he said in a false voice of support, prying the blond off of him and giving a quick flash of a smile as he retreated out the room. "You just stay right here. I'll get back to you in an hour or two. Count on it."

"Th-thanks A-a-ax, you're a g-good friend..."

"Yeah sure whatever. Bye!" Now free, Axel rushed through a portal into the living room, rolled himself onto the couch, snatched up the remote and turned on the TV with a loud, enthusiastic, "Bang! Come to Papa!"

And 'bang' indeed. The TV exploded.

As Axel dropped the remote and jumped out of the sofa cursing loudly in shock, a loud girlish cackle rang out behind him. Whirling around as smoke filled the room, he spotted Larxene leaning on the doorframe holding her sides. He ground his teeth and had crossed the room in two strides. He was about to try and intimidate her by grabbing her and using his superior height to hold her dangling suspended against a wall whilst he poured out a violent session of swearing, when she promptly ducked out of the way and he stumbled forward with flailing arms and a wail. She only laughed harder and chided, "Serves you right for what you did earlier!"

"I only said I wondered what would happen if we left you asleep on that bus!"

"I wasn't even asleep! I heard what you said!"

"You didn't have to blow up the TV, you bitch!"

"Rather I broke your arm again, huh?"

"Bring it. I challenge you to a sparring session! No weapons. Just our own ability!"

"I accept!"

He twitched. "You... do?"

She gave a snarling smile. "Oh? Were you expecting a 'weak', 'helpless', 'frail' little girl like me to say no? I'm sick of you doubting my strength. I've been waiting for this for a good long time now."

"Oh..." He had – actually – been expecting exactly what she said. This made things a little... awkward. He swallowed, then recovered his composure, "Yeah well I'll prove you ARE all those things! It's about time you learnt your place around here, iwoman/i, and I guess it's down to me to show it to you."

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"FINE!"

"... _Fine._"

* * *

"Sora!"

"No... no!"

_What are... those noises...?_

_Who... am I...?_

_What am I?_

_I feel... nothing..._

* * *

"Do you want purpose?"

A nod.

S.O.R.A

Lights, sounds, breezes whirling about him.

A bright flash.

Bright blue eyes raised heavily, sleepily, lifelessly to look upon the name before him now.

R.O.X.A.S

"The new you," Xemnas explained with a smile.

* * *

"Come to gloat?"

The voice was sharp, angry, bitter. Like an agitated cat that had been disturbed whilst doing mischief. She was licking her wounds, it seemed, and he was intruding. He merely stayed in the doorway and said quietly, "Congratulations. You're the first woman to have ever come that close to putting me through a solid marble wall. You may also like to know I have only one perfectly functioning leg, and both my eyes are black. I respect that."

She ceased pressing the cold pack against her bruises, paused, but did not look at him. Then grunted moodily but in a softer, less violent tone, "Get out of my room."

"... I was impressed enough that I didn't throw the match for you, because I know you wouldn't have been able to stand that."

"I said OUT."

This time he paid attention, and left quietly, closing the door behind her before limping down the hallway towards his own room. He needed sleep, and he needed it badly. The potion should be kicking in any minute now...

"Number Eight."

He dearly resisted the urge to groan, and turned around, standing to attention as best as his aching back would let him. Xemnas stood before him, hooded and impressive against the white around him. Beside him was a hooded member that seemed far too short to be Zexion, and the proportions seemed almost... child-like.

"Look after this for me, while I call a meeting."

And just like that, Xemnas portalled away, leaving the newcomer stood gazing into space into the hallway. Axel frowned, gave a quiet 'Tch, great... now I'm a babysitter', and approached the short cloaked figure warily.

"So what has Xemnas dragged in off the streets this time? Another bitchy woman? You're a scrawny thing, ain't you?"

"..."

"... Silent treatment huh? What's your name?"

The strange little creature just tilted its head and then simply repeated distantly, "... my... name?"

Axel feigned a jolt of surprise and clutched his chest in mockery. "Dear lord, it speaks! Can it do anything else? Like, answer my question? Oh, how I wonder!"

Confused, the youngster tilted his head the other way. "..."

Axel folded is arms, waited for a response, realised he wasn't going to get one, then sighed heavily. "I don't think you and me are going to get along at all well, newbie."


End file.
